Saturday, February 6, 2010

Lion King & Poor little Simba.

After the cola debacle, I sent this frantic mail to the boss in the internship company, to materialize the boon offered to me on the last day – and that was; you can do your project in the same company. Awesome I thought to myself, known people, known company and a really good brand to bank on.

I met him on Jan 7th to finalize the topic, and I was offered “New product development”. So the project was all set to roll; I fixed my next appointment with him and I went back home a happy girl. The product given to me was bio-chemistry or biotech related. My chitti pats me on my back and says – take it up! “Lovely topic, you’ll learn a lot and once you do a great job, they’ll absorb you in.” So this was the RAW deal, and I was on cloud nine.

There were two things I had no idea about – a ) The product was an enigma in itself. b) All my lessons in marketing had been very very text-bookish, plus I knew a lot of examples, thanks to the case studies. The project was made to sound like, I was Harry Potter in search of those horceuxes, and I was game! There was a concept jumble in my peanut sized brain and I had to sort it out.

So like, any sensible project intern, I start off with the literature review. I read up on random articles, scientific publications and lots of googling later, I was ready with a 30page report about the product, how we can use it, and the potential uses to the customer. This was named technical research. I mailed my project guide in college and went to meet him with this huge grin plastered on my face. He reads thru my notes, and gives me his signature dirty look; which meant, I was ‘screwed’.

Project Guide: Sandhya, are you a scientist?
Me: No Sir…
PG: Are you a bio-chemistry student?
Me: No sir…

After this; He got back to his usual gyaan giving self and complimented me on being a very imaginative person, and how I should channelize my energies on working on the management side of the project and not burden myself with the technical aspects. I was also made to borrow the 11th edition of Marketing Management from the library and read out the passages aloud.

With this, I meet Lion King in his office and tell him that I need a report on the product technicalities, so that I can start working on the management aspects.

Lion King: Looks at me, and he says – this is what I wanted you to do ma; come out with a marketing report.
Me: But sir, you said it was a new product, and you just gave me the name, and nothing more. And you also said, decide on the sources and all. So I did a technical research.
Lion King: (Sheepish grin) heheheheh
Me: So what next sir? I have a model of NPD; we should start off with it sir. Lion King: I have a report on the initial stages of the product, read it and come back on Friday.

Lion King: You read the report ah ma?
Me: Yes sir. But if the product is ready to be manufactured, we need to start with the concept development stage now.
Lion King: But what about basics ma?
Me: What basics sir? (Bloody confused)
Lion King: The marketing things ma..
Me: 4Ps , 3Cs and STP Sir?
Lion King: yeah yeah.
Me: Sir, But I need more information on the product. I have to meet the R&D people and find out the features of the product.
Lion King; that and all you don’t need ma. Do google search that is enough.
Me: (Not giving up) Also, I have to go on Sales visits and find out the customer needs.
Lion king: Listen ma.. You go to the medical shops and collect data on the products available.
Me: Yes sir..
Lion King: Come back on Friday ok ma?

Note: the Boss is not going to be at the office on Friday.

One month into the project, I realize that my boss is a lot like Dilbert’s Boss. Are all bosses like this only? Or is it that I get the best of the lot?

As of today 10.00PM, the status of my new product development is- NO product
The topic is super good, and a blank canvas has been handed over to me. It’s like having a bag full of atta; I can either bake cakes, or make rotis, or add veggies to them and make bajji or make dosa, or make some savories out of it. Likewise – here is a product, I have to develop variants of it, price it, package it, brand it, advertise it, sell it and identify buyers, potential customers. And the boss thinks google will help me. If only the boss listens to what I have to tell him.

The project means the world to me for one simple reason – a great project guarantees a job.

Ende guruvayurappa!!

Ende Bhagwathi Amme!

PS: Now I know what to gift my boss: Dilbert comics! :D


Anonymous said...

poor lil simba cud surely use help timon and pumba,.... as the big ol king wont understand and is pretty stubborn abt the reaches of google .... all the best handlin the big grumpy ol` lion ....

gitanjali.j said...

Your boss doesn't have this link right? :P and Dilbert..LOL! You DO feel better reading that, don't you? :D Maybe its part of the boss gene, Sandy..Chill :D

munchkin said...

:P what a plight!! :D

sawan said...

lol, how I wish I knew the mail id of ur boss!! sadist I am!! :D all the very best for the project. give us the good news about its approval soon!! :P

Raji said...

He he, Sandy your project has now become a cover story huh..NPD has now become New Post Development lol ;)keep goings..

Sunshine said...

HeHeHeHe.. I shudn't be laughing at your plight, but am sorry.. I just cant stop laughing!

Ignore kar aur chill maar :D

Deepz said...

Sandy ma gal, it was a fun read...most entertaining...a refreshing one during such troubled times- read project review looms ahead!!!;-)

Vedha said...

hayo u finish u could go back to good old mop days wherein you just had to do some crap and give it off eh? :P

well...did u explain ur status in college..?

vsk said...

On a more serious note, Vedha is right. It's only because crap was taken in casually and graded that students didn't get to learn how to write a good report. I still remember the shock I got with the poor D+ I got in my first WAC case (40 year ago, nearly). I truly wish I could teach report writing at MOP and elsewhere.